In my opinion, Scientology and Tom Cruise cannot be mocked enough. So I give you this video.
the parody video Tom Cruise WANTS you to see! on FunnyOrDie.com
That’s Jerry O’Connell, famous (initially) for starring with my mancrush in "Stand By Me", and who also did a decent job in the scifi series "Sliders", despite that show going into the toilet after the first season. It had a lot of promise, too. He’s in like fifteen series on TV right now, too.
This video makes up for "Mission to Mars", too. O’Connell was just about the only good thing in that movie anyway.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Hail Xenu!!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Seen it earlier on. Yay for bashing of the sillies.
But isn’t that guy his friend?
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Phil, are you still having to baby your server…I keep getting errors on some of your entries…like the meteorites and ice-ponds.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:05 pm
“The Aristocrats” (Ha ha ha ha ha) That’s funny! Jerry O’Connell nailed Tom Cruise’s babble perfectly.
“Sliders” started out with a cool premise - parallel universes occupying the same place and this brilliant kid figures out how to slide into them, but he and his friends can’t get back. Kind of similar to the old 1960s show “Time Tunnel” and like it, went downhill after season one. “Sliders” was created by Tracy Tormé - singer Mel Tormé’s son. O’Connell added a lot to that show.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:35 pm
don’t forget he burned Cruise in Jerry Maguire as well
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:41 pm
“When you’re an astronomer, and drive by an accident, you have to stop and help, because you realize you’re the only one that can help….” (Or something like that.)
BTW, is your server down or slow? Couldn’t log on earlier.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:53 pm
I believe the server problems are due to the site having been FOXed — they had a mention of this site on one of the front page stories (Bigfoot on Mars).
I always liked the first season of My Secret Identity, where they tried to use science to deal with his abilities. E.G., he had to use a (non-polluting) propellant to fly when he was weightless, and couldn’t just “take off”. I think they discarded all that later in the series.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:15 pm
I thought Sliders had great promise and was a faithful viewer during the first season. I even wrote to the network to bring it back when it was initially cancelled. (That is the only time I wrote to a network!) Even though the show came back, it quickly degenerated into an unwatchable mess. Very sad. Fortunately, Jerry’s career fared better.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Blasphemy! Sliders was good for at least a season and a half. Good writing, exceptional cast… huge disappointment where it ended up.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Jerry has just gone up a dozen notches on the ladder to true coolness—at least in my book.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:36 pm
The Cectic blog has a great cartoon regarding Mission to Mars:
http://cectic.com/101.html
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Thanks for that, Phil! After sitting through that mind numbing piece of garbage that was Tom Cruise, I seriously needed a laugh.
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:02 pm
ROTFL
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I’m finally getting around to watching the Tom Cruise thing, and the one overriding image I get in my mind is of Rowley Birkin QC, from the Fast Show…
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=HhtNNi1dlxQ
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Did anyone notice the short music cues through the film were the opening bars of the “Mission Impossible” theme?
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Well, I guess he’ll never work for United Artists! Sliders was dreadful, but I can forgive him after that.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:06 pm
WOW!!!! Guess he won’t be co-starring in any Tom Cruise movies anytime soon.
By the way, to fully appreciate how brilliant this Jerry O’Connell spoof is, you need to see the actual Tom Cruise version.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:11 pm
Coding mistake: Clicking on the video frame shows the video, but clicking on “this video” in the second sentence goes to the Fark.com story about the lake meteorite.
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I don’t understand what he’s talking about. He doesn’t elaborate on anything. KSW? What the hell is that? I guess you have to be a scientologist or something to understand. Scientology doesn’t make any sense to me. Do they believe their aliens from another planet or something. What kind of help is he talking about? The only thing I see is Tom Cruise is the one that needs “help”.
(I’m referring to Tom Cruise Scientology interview)
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Hmmm, I have a new theory on the Texas UFO flap. It’s Xenu returning, and he’s looking for Tom!
Mr. Xenu. You can have him. No, please, take him away.
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:19 pm
He nailed Cruise’s look right on. Well done!
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:12 pm
OK, my take on the matter, combining Jerry’s audio with Tom’s video…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWSlPYV_U7w
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:25 pm
xav0971 says: “I don’t understand what he’s talking about. He doesn’t elaborate on anything. KSW? What the hell is that?”
Keep Scientology Working. It’s their code phrase and mantra to eliminate distractions from outsiders who keep pointing out the idiocy of the whole thing.
- Jack
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:35 pm
Hey, don’t forget his “country boy in the big city” role as a homicide detective on “Crossing Jordan.” Great show. It took the network moguls three seasons to kill it by moving it all over the schedule.
O’Connell was one of the reasons to watch the show, but the whole ensemble was brilliant: Jill Hennessy, Miguel Ferrier, Steve Valentine (Nigel) and “Bug” (whose name I can’t even pronounce, let alone spell).
- Jack
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:46 pm
All that auditing seems to be really effective.
January 24th, 2008 at 1:43 am
“For me it’s all about KFC. It’s just good chicken.”
Best vid I’ve seen in a long time.
January 24th, 2008 at 3:11 am
This would be truly hysterical if the Cult of $cientology weren’t the most sinister organization on the planet. For anyone who values the preservation of free minds, visit Operation Clambake at http://www.xenu.net/
I sincerely hope that Jerry survives the wrath of the Co$….
January 24th, 2008 at 6:15 am
Jerry, you are so close…to the perfect TC clone, almost…perfect…but don’t ever touch his madness…it would be a shame to lose a needed, gifted person to the cult of Stupidity!!!…er…Scientology. Not to mention the drain as L.R. Hubbard’s minions suck away your capital to fund their experiments…
What a Actor!!! Give him the highest honors due…Where as tom (on) cruise is a “pretender”. (lower lvl actor, about B flick from say 1950′ish type…)
Lunatik
January 24th, 2008 at 9:54 am
He did a good job with that.
I loved all seasons of Sliders. You just had to learn to adapt to the later ones. They were actually pretty good.
I thought Mission to Mars was also pretty good.
January 24th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
I just adore this vid. Absolutely hilarious… and as has been pointed out here, he nails Cruise dead-on.
January 25th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
It seems that Scientology is undergoing a major PWN’ing by an organization of hackers known as “Anonymous”. They’ve been successful in taking down several Scientology websites so far, with the promise of more to come. I cannot advocate illegal activities, but Scientology does need to be taken down. They have caused more harm than many other “religious” cults.
January 25th, 2008 at 9:34 pm
Anonymous? It’s that just a wonderful, vile group of people who inhabit 4chan?
I wouldn’t be surprised if they did take down some scientology sites though.
http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/Anonymous
January 26th, 2008 at 7:40 pm
Dare one hope that this means that Hollywood (whatever that entails) will finally dare speak out against those nutters?
Or can one still be sure to ruin one’s career in the process unless one is already pretty big? Whatshername from Charlie’s Angels/ET for instance.
January 28th, 2008 at 4:37 am
Maybe it’s time to cover Anonymous’ attack on Scientology? They are legion after all…
January 29th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
Sheer awesome. The hand gestures are so perfect!